Self-Sabotage vs. Self-Love

Why do so many of us become trapped in a cycle of self-sabotage when we have just as much capacity for self-love? One form of sabotage is when we say we want something and then make sure it doesn’t happen. On a conscious level, we don’t want to believe that we are getting in our own way, so we blame our environment, circumstances, job, family, partner, etc., for our lack of follow-through.

Yet, we are often on auto-pilot, keeping ourselves trapped in certain behaviors and habits such as overindulging in food, social media, work, or substances to numb our emotional state. We could also fixate on the minor details and get stuck in perfectionism—this constant act of procrastinating and keeping ourselves small leaves us feeling guilt and shame. Unfortunately, the real reason for this is because we lack self-love and confidence within ourselves.

My experience with self-sabotage:

On a subconscious level, we feel unworthy, not good enough, and not deserving of the success we truly desire. At the beginning of my journey, I witnessed this pattern within myself, keeping me in a shallow vibrational state.

It was only when I embraced myself wholeheartedly, shadows and all, that I overcame self-sabotage within my own life. I started a daily self-love practice and began to see some of these patterns shift. Soon after, I discovered Breathwork Healing, and my heart was cracked wide open. This form of heart medicine allowed me to reach a new level of confidence, worthiness, and empowerment in my life.

Pushing past all my limitations and old beliefs to finally move towards what I deeply knew I deserved to experience every day.

The power of self-love:

If you can resonate with being trapped in some form of self-sabotage within your own life, it’s time to embrace self-love. Increasing self-love will amplify your feelings of worthiness, confidence, and empowerment. By including daily self-love practice along with investing in specific self-love healing sessions, I witnessed a massive shift in the healing of my physical body. I finally found grace by awakening my heart. This grace allowed me to slow down and discover the sense of unconditional love within.

Several years ago, I struggled with an inner-critic that spoke harshly about my body, ability, and healing journey. I found myself getting trapped in discouragement, hopelessness, and victimhood. It wasn’t until I embarked on a more profound journey of intentionally cultivating self-love that I began to see my life blossom.

5 steps I utilized to increase self-love:

1) Forgiving myself and forgiving my past
2) Letting go of my inner-perfectionist
3) Witnessing my ego (inner-critic) without judgment
4) Protecting my energy with healthy boundaries
5) Reparenting my wounded inner-child

We can practice affirmations, journal, and read about self-love, but the genuine transformation occurs when we go within.

Last thoughts:

The greatest heart medicine I’ve experienced is breathwork. It allows you to face your shadows gently. We tuck these shadows, or any aspect of self that we have deemed as unworthy or unlovable, away. But, this suppression only leads to more pain within.

In conclusion, shadow work is an integral aspect of healing at all mind, body, and spirit levels. Breathe easier knowing that it’s safe to embrace all of you. To open the heart to vulnerability and feel the hurt beneath the surface is the only way to find grace. By allowing ourselves to feel the totality of the heart, we discover the truth of who we are.