With the amount of self-help information available on social media, in books, and on podcasts, many of the proclaimed answers to challenges we face in everyday life can seem like quick fixes. Practice mindfulness! Eat more nutritious foods, and drink plenty of water! Dedicate 30 minutes of activity to your daily routine! Work on your meditation! Love yourself! – to name a few. While these might seem like simple solutions, it’s not always easy to keep commitments made to ourselves. It can be incredibly frustrating when staying committed to the needs of others who rely on us isn’t too hard – so why is it difficult to honor a promise to ourselves?
Why do we break self-promises?
How come it can feel effortless and even be exciting to set a new goal or resolution, only to become overwhelming in a week or two? Why do we prioritize other things after we’ve told ourselves we’re working towards something?
It’s not surprising that so many of us struggle with the idea of keeping commitments to ourselves. All too often, we’re taught that it’s selfish or greedy to put our needs first. This, of course, varies by culture and familial structures. But, the general idea of egotism (even misplaced) is looked down upon. Unfortunately, this line of thinking doesn’t align with the truth that taking care of yourself is the only sustainable way of taking care of others.
Secondly, we might value promises to ourselves less than those we make to others because of limiting beliefs. Negative inner thoughts, opinions, or convictions that we hold to be absolute truths. The catch is that these beliefs always restrict us somehow. If we believe we aren’t worthy or good enough to achieve our goals, we’ll always find an excuse to refuse growth.
How can we shift our mindsets?
Recognizing self-sabotaging belief structures is the first step towards changing a limiting belief. However, it’s also important to stop prioritizing doubts and start focusing on our needs and ambitions. Part of that means valuing the goal itself and celebrating achievements (no matter how inconsequential they seem!).
Beginner’s guide to becoming okay with prioritizing self-commitments:
- You can have a lofty goal, but make sure you smaller, more manageable ones, too
- Pause. Every time you’re faced with something that you don’t want to do (but know will help you in the long run), pause for a moment. Ask yourself what you need to get in a better mindset.
- Consistency is key. Significant commitments will take some serious self-discipline! Like training a muscle, it takes time to get good at being consistent. So, begin with a task on the easier end of things like waking up at the same time each morning or meditating for five minutes each day.
Whether you are local to Grand Rapids and can join me at my East Town office The Healing Space or you are somewhere else in the world. Allow me to guide you in this experience of transformative healing.
All of my Breathwork sessions are combined with Reiki Energy Therapy, Crystals, a Holistic Health Consultation & recommendations in-between sessions with healing tools so you can continue empowering your own journey. Learn more about my in-person + virtual offerings HERE.